Denise Matteau of the Truth Convoy YouTube channel has aggravated a number of persons on the internet and in her personal life because she willfully creates false narratives against those she has turned against.
Many have countered her false allegations with facts, as well as expressed the opinion that her false statements are most likely a result of the unresolved grief in her heart due to her daughter’s suicide nine years ago, in late August of 2010. But as we shall observe, the roots of resentment began years before that tragic day. Sadly the death of her daughter is the diamond which has been placed in the setting of a ring of bitter family relationships.
This article, which is over 13,000 words in length, consists primarily of Denise Matteau’s own words in the public domain in chronological order. Attention should be given to what she wrote prior to the death of her daughter (Faith) Sojourner Margret Matteau Jackson in 2010.
For those who have already read this information from the original sources, you might want to skim down to the end where some recent emails pertaining to Denise Matteau and Dave Sweigert are displayed.
[Note: I have not corrected any misspellings in the documents I have quoted from.]
The excerpts below are just a sample of Denise Matteau’s thoughts, which in general reflect an intelligent and sometimes humorous approach to life. As you shall read in her own words, she describes what she considers to be the root cause of a sense of injustice that arose from her early experiences with family and employers. That thread of bitter injustice has been woven so many times throughout her story, that now it is the cloth from which many of her false allegations are constructed from.
December 12, 2006 – Almost thirteen years ago
On that day, Denise Matteau created a blog called The Truth About the Lenox 7: the truth about corruption in America, starting with Massachusetts.
Although the two posts in this blog were posted by a “CAL”, the words are those of Denise Matteau who explains in her article titled Welcome, “I am one of several people who have come together to demand investigations into a number of incidents of American corruption that connect back to Massachusetts, especially to the infamous ‘Lenox 7’ drownings in Laurel Lake, 1981, in Berkshire county in the town of Lee, in which Barry Griffin, Jr. and Richard Retzel lost their lives.”
“Team members of this blog are individuals like myself who have direct family involvement with Massachusetts corruption, either as victims or as witnesses, usually as both…If we can get the word out about the incredible amount of conflict-of-interest and family privilege that has been involved in protecting murderers and other criminals in Massachusetts while the lives and careers of innocent people have been destroyed, then we can begin to put an end to this 30-year reign of terror…”.
It does not appear that there were a team of writers, as only one article of substance, How It Began, was posted on December 13, 2006. It ended with a to be continued, that was never followed up on.
Denise Matteau begins her story, “In 1981 I was struggling to complete college while raising a small child in the aftermath of a divorce. I had moved back to my hometown, Webster, Massachusetts to be near my parents.”
News Of The Drownings
“I had been to my sister’s house, the Burke home, in Lenox Dale, Massachusetts for my nephew Jody’s graduation from Lenox High. After the family parties were over, we all went our way, only to receive the news soon after that the State Police had arrived to arrest Jody Burke for his part in the tragic drowning of two Lee High grads, Barry Griffin and Richard Retzel, in Laurel Lake in Lee, Massachusetts.”
“Renee Burke, my sister, was nearly hysterical. She thought the world of her son and insisted that he was being set up by envious people. None of us doubted her very much because at that point we did not know what had happened. It did seem like it might have been an accident according to what she told us. Real discussion of the events within the family did not begin until the trial approached, and being in the eastern part of the state, I had not seen many news reports about the incident.”
“During the year after the drownings, another tragedy struck the Burke household. The youngest daughter was raped by a teacher who was found to have raped five of his high-school gym students at Lenox High. Now Renee was trying to get lenient treatment for her son from the same DA, Anthony Ruberto, who was responsible for prosecuting the teacher. (Ruberto is now deceased, having gone on to become a judge, and his brother James is now the Mayor of the county seat, Pittsfield.)”
“I continued to be only peripherally aware of the events in Berkshire County as I tried to juggle single parenthood, aging parents, and college studies in Worcester County. When my mother told me of the rape and my niece’s attempted suicide, I immediately contacted Renee. I was concerned because I had been molested while living with Renee and her husband as a young teen, and I never had spoken of it. I told her I had been through that without naming him (actually this was emotional denial on my part because she had full knowledge) and tried to talk with Renee about her daughter’s need for compassion and support. Renee was cold and abusive, as usual, blaming her daughter and treating the medical response as if it were over a stupid accident or something. She said they were in group therapy as if this nothing more than yet another major inconvenience her daughter was causing. It turned out that her daughter’s case was the pivotal case to identifying the rapist, then finding the other victims. Renee was hostile to my remark that my niece was a real hero and deserved support. I abandoned any thought of reasoning with Renee and went back to focusing on my own household.”
Christmas In Gill, Massachusetts
“The Christmas after that was hosted by my brother James Matteau and his wife Lucille in Gill, Massachusetts. He was a selectman and the head of a local social-service agency there, and their small “Cape” style house was filled with people since most of my nieces and nephews were of late high-school and college age. As the evening wore on and the eggnog and punch was consumed, the nieces all clustered around Kathy, the teacher’s victim, and gave her exactly the kind of emotional support she needed. All except her older sister Loree, who was majoring in social work at Providence College. Ironically, this future social worker subjected her sister to continuous insult and verbal abuse, even more than usual, and I tried several times to get her to chill. Renee then joined her and included me in the hostility, so I backed off rather than risk escalating it.”
“Renee’s husband, Joe, was also getting a little tipsy. He had molested me from age 12 to age 15, and I had put an end to it by holding a fork as a weapon and threatening to mark him in a place Renee would notice if he did not stop. After that he and I had a kind of truce, in which I could refer to the fork if he got flirty and he would back off with a joke. So we got along well enough. Joe asked me to talk, then in a very deeply touching manner unburdened himself and asked my forgiveness for what he had done to me, telling me how much he was learning from the therapy. I forgave him. We both then tried to have a talk with Renee, but she was vicious and would have none of it.”
“This connects back to the Lenox 7 during the next year, because bribes were arranged around both cases, using social services personnel that Renee helped set up at the new “feminist” Women’s Center, even while Renee Burke was threatened with charges of intimidating a witness by staff at the Berkshire Medical Center for being vicious to Kathy and interfering with the prosecution. They never did charge her, though.”
The rest of this article can be read at this link.
How It Began: Comments
Below are a few comments to the How It Began article.
DS Matteau said…
“JUSTME” appears to be a member of the group helping the murderers’ families keep the lid on. I am the original blogger and below is a copy of an email conversation with “JUSTME”, which casts a lot of light on these two murders:
[“JustMe to Blogger, 9//2008”]
I’m sorry…I have been away and also needed a day to digest the info that you put forth. This seems more about Renee herself, than the Lenox 7. I never said I was a first responder at the scene of Kathy’s suicide attempt, I said it was my ex-husband.
DS Matteau said…
Here is my reply to “JustMe”, 9/10/2008
My concerns are complicated.
I did see Renee manipulate medication against Joe Sr. in order to pressure his co-operation in forcing Jody to retract his confession. Jody did not have to face the original murder charges and I was there in the house and saw her force her own son to co-operate with the killers and retract his confession, even though he had a clean record, was an honor student, and as the driver of the vehicle he could have easily seen minor charges eventually get sealed. I argued passionately with her about it with Jody right there in the room in tears because of her yelling at him about his co-operation with the State Police.
I did not understand the seriousness at the time. I didn’t recognize that it was more than just Renee being overbearing, but I soon became frightened for my own safety and —‘s safety as I saw how psychopathic Renee was becoming. I still fear for —‘s safety. Renee wrecked her life and she doesn’t even know why, because she was only 6 when this all started. She believes the family attacked her for religious reasons. Renee tried to drive her to suicide, too. She also nearly killed — in similar fashion and this happened in about 2000, 2001. Around the time of my mother’s death. I heard Renee talk about what she did to —, with her excuses, and my dad talked about it a little with me about what happened. He tried, in his own way & in his old age, to protect people from Renee.
I also saw several incidents during the period of the trials that suggest —-‘s attempt at suicide was due to Renee’s abuse and threats, and she traded favors regarding —‘s case and the Lenox 7 case.
I had an incident in my own job in Boston regarding that connection between the two cases. I can easily document that those favors went way beyond personal family attempts to get lenient treatment for Jody.
Nucifaro was involved. Renee was Nucifaro Sr’s bookkeeper at the time of the drownings. She is a CPA and did the books for a number of Lenox lawyers and businesses besides her work at GE. In fact, she did those books on GE computers.
I am twelve years younger than Renee. She moved in for the kill when I stopped being her obedient baby sister, and I had to do what I could to protect myself and — as best I could. There are numerous incidents documenting Renee using her daughter Loree and other people inside the social service system to get information to intimidate or blackmail witnesses.
After the Lenox 7 trials, she began to use [her social worker daughter] as a professional service to people who need that kind of favor.
She ran private financial accounts through the GE computers. Barry Griffin’s father was in a position to know that she had access and the ability to manipulate protected data at GE if he were ever to be asked the right questions. I know this not only from conversation with him here in Texas, but because I was, for a time, her confidant (before the drownings and the escalation of abuse in the family) and also because I have been a union steward as well as a member of some nonprofits boards and therefore I could see that certain things she was doing were not “kosher” and had only one explanation: money laundering & criminal intimidation.
She tried to involve me and several other relatives in a business that she wanted to run through her computer accounts inside the GE computer. I was to be set up with a “front” and I can easily document it because I rented the property and several other people were involved before I argued with Renee about the GE computer and then pulled the plug on it, myself.
I also worked, on the books, for a similar front Renee had set up and I was naive about it, but I was aware of Renee’s postion as a “development funder” and then when the argument about my own business happened it became clear in hindsight what was going on.
Renee was the executive administrative secretary directly answerable to the GE vice president in charge of GE Plastics. She also was one of the original people trained in GE’s NY office to go back and set up and run the first IBM computerized office system. We were very proud of her. She has a genius IQ and it was very exciting at the time.
But I understood, after she asked me to run a front business for her, exactly what kind of back-doors she had to be using in the computers at GE in order to be able to do that. Either she was running her own game or she was in charge of a game GE was running under her job-title. I told her I would not be part of it because I thought it was just her being reckless. It was a few years before I understood what she was doing.
[“JustMe” reply, 9/13/2008] [notice the sarcasm and the twisting of my words in this. She is lying about being a concerned member/friend of the Retzel family.]
Yes, your concerns are complicated, to say the least. So are mine. How does one manipulate, using meds no less, against their spouse in order to get someone else to retract a confession? Jody did not have to retract anything he said to the SP, because he said nothing different than his co-conspirators. Plain and simple. They knew they did something wrong by leaving the scene. What happened at that boat ramp was complete mayhem, and those boys, Jody included, knew it wasn’t kosher. Perhaps that is why he was in tears. They could have rescued those two boys and they knew it…albeit, after they left the scene.
Obviously, I know more than you regarding that night, because if you had something concrete to say it would have been said. Nothing Renee did with her “insider information” thru her connections with GE made a whole lot of difference did it?. I am sorry that she tried to manipulate you into doing something illegal as well as ruining your 6 year old daughter’s life due to religous reasons. What can I say? Except, that I know 2 boys died that night due to the irresponcible behavior of 7 boys that should have known better.
Joe SR? Making a difference in Jody’s testimony/confession? Please! Highly unlikely. You forget, I knew them way back then, Renne being a powerful person in the judicial system? Maybe, but I would say the Bianco’s had more power than her, as far as manipulation/threatening goes. Perhaps she is built up more in YOUR mind than that of the judicial system
I’m sorry, but I can not take anything you say too seriously. You write very well, but the details of what you are saying are not relevant to the Lenox 7, nor to Kathy’s suicide attempt. I feel the anger towards your sister, thru your words, but none of what you say has much relevance regarding something that is near and dear to my heart, and the hearts of MY family. Whatever business dealings and fronts that Renee proposed back in the day have nothing to do with the Lenox 7. Those 7 boys let pieces of humanity slip through their fingers as they DROVE to their next destination, The driver’s record should have been sealed? Why? Because Jody was the driver? Do you know what they said he did at the scene?
Anyway, my interest does not totally revolve around the Burke family drama, or your personal schew on things, it’s mainly to do with the Lenox 7, and where they are today. I know things were wrong back then, but I myself was too young to do anything about it. I still can’t make changes to the outcome of that night, but I at least can help others to remember. Dickie and Barry were real people…they didn’t look real the last time I saw them together, but the Price Chopper stickers that their Little League team stuck on their coffin, brought them back to life for me and my family in a big way.
ds matteau said…
“Justme”, you claim to be a friend or relative of the Retzel family, and you make this strange statement: ” I have no hidden agenda that should concern you personally.”
Well, just what IS your agenda, Ms. “JustMe”?
Mine is clear: I want Renee Burke of Pittsfield Massachusetts to finish her life in jail paying for the lives she destroyed and ruined when she chose to manipulate her son’s crime to make money and ahe chose to attack innocent people like my daughter.
You disgust me, Ms “JustMe”, for you to even suggest that I should care more for those Burkes or even the Retzels than I do for my own daughter.
I want all of the participants to come clean and let the truth finally be told and those who have not paid for their crimes should pay. They were not aquitted in a fair trial by a jury that saw all the evidence, after all. Evidence was criminally suppressed and witnessed have been attacked by Renee Burke and her supporters for years.
For what it is worth, Jody Burke has had to let Renee Burke control of all his finances. She cooked the books for lawyers and others on the computers at GE and she continues in that career today. She controls everyone she touches, or she destroys them, just as any psychopathic narcissist does.
Her own son graduated with honors that day, hours before helping to kill Barry and Richard in a set-up brawl. He didn’t set it up, Bianco did. Jody and one of his friends had bought that truck with plans to travel across the country before returning to run an honest, fine building business. He had won a national award for fine cabinetry. He had a bright future.
Age-wise, if you are the ex-wife of one of the “first responders” to his sister’s suicide, Ms “JustMe” you should be a bit older than Richard Retzel. But you are not. You are one of the kids who graduated with Jody.
You wrote to me as if you were concerned about what Renee Burke did, and you hinted that you know one of the first responders was concerned about the scene. I know a lot of people were concerned about what happened to my niece.
Then you make disparaging remarks about this “first responder”, your supposed ex-husband, and you get angry at me for not giving you specific details that you say your own “ex-husband” refused to divulge.
No ambulance EMT is expected to keep secrets from his own wife, Ms. “JUstMe”, and there is no reason for you to have those details from me. You, yourself, are one of the young people who was there, in that very crowd.
If the first responders from that suicide attempt would get in touch with me and support my effort to bring justice to all those victims, most of all to Barry Griffin and Richard Retzel, it would be done right, Ms “JustMe”. It would not be done through your parasitic gossip.
And why do you insert a man’s name in parentheses in the middle of another email, while berating me for criticizing Renee Burke?
I have faced Renee Burke’s threats and Vermont Commissioner James Matteau’s support of the attacks on several members of our family whenever Renee leaned on him because of her well-founded paranoia that someday justice will prevail, and she will be seen as the manipulator who exploited her own son’s tragic folly.
Richard Retzel and Barry Griffin were not the Lenox 7’s only victims. The State Police know this. They did not go on as “7”, but the conspiracy to commit murder did continue into other conspiracies to harm witnesses in other crimes involving Renee Burke.
What is very bizarre, “JustMe”, is that my failure to give you specific details causes you to lash out on behalf of the killers and especially on behalf of Renee Burke.
Renee’s son did and said terrible things that night, but as a human being with at least some decency still left in him, he felt remorse and he tried to come clean to the authorities.
Some, like Anthony Ruberto, have gone to their graves thinking they got away with it all. Others are retired, and still others are advanced in their careers.
A lot of people want me to stop posting, “JustMe”, you are not the only one. But I am tired of hearing news of funerals after violent and suspicious deaths, and of discovering that a murder victim was not random but was a close aquaintance of this or that witness. I’m tired of watching decent people’s lives be destroyed just because the Retzels and the Griffins were intimidated into silence for those few years when there might have been a chance at justice.
I know that you are a friend of the Burkes, Ms “JustMe” because no member of the Retzel family needs to know the details you asked about my own relatives.
You are fishing for Renee Burke and your bait stinks.
Even all the way from Florida, your bait stinks up all of Berkshire County.
You guys make me sick. The Burke family is an amazing and loving family. Jody Burke would not hurt a soul, He is a best friend, an excellent father and a great soon to be grand-father. Just because the tradgedy happened, and jody was guilty by association, does not mean he did it or that he is a bad person. You obviously don’t know them, otherwise you wouldn’t say things like this. and as for YOU RENEES SISTER!! you are a psycopath! and you know it. so does the hole family. barely anyone from this family has talked to you in years. they actually wanted restraining orders against because you insist on calling every family member and threatening their lives. IF ANYTHING YOU ARE THE ONE THAT WOULD HARM PEOPLES LIVES! and your the one that should be locked up, not in jail but in a mental hospital! you all are so wrong on every level! and Renee is one of the most caring people ever. she does not abuse ANYONE! especially her children or husband. and Kathy wasn’t abused as well. everyone in that family is doing very well, and none of this nonsense is true. get a life.
The following comments were made to this blog 2 months and 6 months, respectively, after the death of Denise’s daughter.
Anonymous said…This blog writer has all sorts of insanity on the internet. I can’t believe her own family doesn’t sue her for slander and libel.
The writer has been in jail and in a mental hospital.
Do a search on her name to discover what she does on the internet.
Anonymous said…Denise Matteau
Are you proud of how your whole family seems to view you? Is it any wonder that people on the internet can’t stand you? You’ve played this persecution and victim complex for years now when in reality you are the stalker. You are the one ruining people’s lives. You are a disgrace to your family and if anyone is to blame for your daughter killing herself, it’s you who made her life the same hell you make anyone else’s that you meddle in. You need to be locked up again. Jail or a mental ward. No matter, you’ve been in both before. That’s where you belong.
February 26, 2011 at 6:51 PM
A sad comment on the obituary of James P. Matteau, Denise’s father
Almost seven years after her father died, Denise left this comment on the obituary page of her father. Note that the obituary itself displays this oddity in the second sentence, saying “He was the father of Lorene Burke of Pittsfield.”, although there were in fact five children in total. The writer of this obituary, which I am presuming is Lorene (Renee) places her as the primary relation to James P. Matteau. The other children’s names are an afterthought in this write-up, especially it seems the addition of the other two daughters to the obituary. Whatever the sequence was, these slights or oversights are often like pouring salt on a wound.
Denise wrote on June 6, 2011:
Comments made by Denise Matteau as “dsm” on the Rick Ross Cult Education Institute (CEI) Forum.
[To see all comments written by dsm go to this link Cult Education Institute forum comments by dsm.]
It must be remembered that comment titles are generally created by the person who starts a thread on a forum, and may not reflect Denise Matteau’s choice of words if she commented on someone else’s topic.
Well hailmary,I did not know much about you PAS. I am telling you as per my knowledge regarding PAS.Though PAS is quiet a common term, yet many confusion & wrong belief is assocoated with this term.PAS normally follows few rules.First rule involves active blocking of contact between child & absent parent. Next law concludes false or non distinct abuse of the absent parents.
This was done to me. I lost my daughter because of her being punished by several people for any positive contact se had with me. The lies told about me in my absence were extreme. I raised her, and when this began to take full effect in her teens, I kept thinking that there would be an opportunity to explain the lies. But it did not happen.
She seemed to be so brainwashed she completely forgot the childhood I provided, as single parent, and I know she was punished for expressing any happy memories.
I had to use miles to distance myself from the abusers, but she chose to live within their circle of influence, and I actually no longer know if she is even dead or alive. I have to just have faith that she is living her life as she sees fit.
I am a cult survivor. Not important which one, just that years ago I was recruited to a controlling cult similar to many you list here and that left me with a lot of wariness after I left it.
One of the problems is that with the PTSD that remians, I can sometimes be “hypervigilant”. I am wondering if I am being hypervigilant now, or if a trusted friend is in fact acting as a cult recruiter.
I just found out that this friend went to several business contacts of mine with the excuse she could not “find” me, and expressed lots of concern about my welfare. Both contacts know me well enough to laugh about it. I am indeed going through an economic rough patch, and I was able to explain that my friend is a bit of a spoiled type who panics at the thought of not being able to afford a day at the spa, while I make a hobby of surviving economic train-wrecks, but in the back of my mind I am beginning to get concerned.
My past experience with a cult was that they used to “encircle” their members by getting involved in meddlesome ways with their new recruits’ relationships. When I began to notice these patterns of behavior I was told I was “paranoid” and I was abused because I could not convince my own family and friends that the interference in my life was deliberate. I really could not be sure, myself, at times, and that is what made exitting the cult very difficult.
Now I feel like it is happening again. This friend is someone I care about, but she does have some naive associations with people in “support” networks, and I worry that her behavior might be more than just her own tendency to be a nervous mother hen. I have criticized her support networks and told her some concerns that such networks can be cults, but it did not seem to be a threat to me and my criticism was mild.
Now I worry that she may have shared my criticisms with her network and they want her to cripple my private life. But I also worry that I may be over-reacting because of past trauma with a cult that used to do that.
Has anyone got any suggestions about what I could do or say to find out if my friend is just being a little over-bearing or if she is in fact working a strategy on behalf of a cult that may have felt threatened by my criticism? (mostly I was just being sarcastic, not trying to de-program or anything, but if she shared my remarks innocently with a genuine cult they might get paranoid that I meant more than expressing an opinion.)
In my efforts to deal with the PTSD that I have, I have occasionally gone to 12-step meetings as a last resort. They can be helpful if they are run by responsible people.
I think the best thing is to try to get your relative to sit down with you and a licensed psychologist, together. The psychologist knows what the ethical standards are and could ask the right questions to get at the problem. Then if necessary, you could take the results of meeting with that psychologist to a regulatory agency to find out what is going on and find out what you need to do to help your loved one.
I was once a member of NatLFed. It bothers me to see that oftentimes people want to limit this cult to a certain time-frame, set of members, arenas of activity, etc. NatLFed was, and still is, a kind of meta-cult that specialized in forming fronts that were directly connected to it as well as infiltrating other groups, especially other cults, in order to force compliance with its own goals.
NatLFed’s goals were a bizarre mixture of stalinist leftwing fascism and American socialist programs. Maybe this part of NatLFed’s existence can be placed in the past, because the goals were formed during their rise in the 1970’s and 1980’s, and now maybe the NatLFed goals are nothing more than the self-serving goals of any large organization: to survive and control its environment, but NatLFed operatives (cadres, whatever you want to call them) are still out there. They still control important services in poor communities and use those services to enslave vulnerable people and turn those people against their own self-interests as well as against the rest of society.
NatLFed concentrated heavily on artists when I encountered it as a producer in public access television in the early 1990’s. I had an extensive resume in silk-screen and other art trades, and was working on a television project that I hoped would become a syndicated program when I was told by the station manager that I would have no problem getting all the equipment privileges I needed if I contributed a little bit of time to another producer’s “pet project”, the local NatLFed food pantry and fuel-assistance program. I had no trouble complying with this simple and apparently altruistic (on the manager’s part) request.
The other producer was the daughter of Rockwell Kent, a famous martyr to the American Communist cause. She was also a typical NatLFed leadership cadre in that she was 100% American-urban-cultured, thinking her own culture so superior to all others that none other existed. I want to say New York City culture, but I know that a great deal of the NatLFed roots came out of Seattle and Ohio groups of the New Left of the 1970’s. They share a similar class culture that infuses their socialist ideology with the most ludicrous bourgeoisie prejudice that anyone could imagine.
I was the daughter of strong labor organizers in Massachusetts and Connecticut mills, my mother went with the Freedom Riders groups in that famous summer, and I was certainly no stranger to socialist politics and ideals. My art education was well-founded in European traditional techniques, but since I was more interested in my own work and in the creative work of people like Picasso than in American Communist Martyr history, I did not recognize Rockwell Kent as anything more than a vaguely familiar name when the NatLFed cadre introduced herself.
(If I ever do get the strength to actually write the full story, I hope to include the satirical elements, to counterbalance the genuine horror of that cult: there is power in satire and we need to start satirizing NatLFed!)
You have to picture this: a woman who feels herself entitled to all of the upper-crust culture of New York is in constant drama-queen-martyr mode in the hills of rural Massachusetts. She gets handed yet another yokel (me) to train, is impressed by the skill and history of that yokel’s backgoround (who knew there were socialists outside of Greenwich Village?!) but alas! The Yokel fails to genuflect at the name of Rockwell Kent!
It gets funnier.
But the violence that characterized the NatLFed in Berkshire County was never funny. NatLFed hooked up very closely with the local criminal class, as it does in every neighborhood, and people lived in real fear of what could happen to them if they challenged NatLFed groups, even if they did not know the NatLFed name.
The building in which NatLFed had its headquarters was donated to it by the Ruberto family. It had been their fish market, and Anthony Ruberto was the district attorney around the time I was becoming active with the food pantry. His brother has been the mayor of that city recently. While I was active there, the issue was my right to produce my program as I saw fit. I did not know I was treading on NatLfed toes, but I did know I was getting lots of demands put on me by the NatLFed cadre.
Something else I did not know at the time: back in 1981, when there was a very controversial case called the “Lenox 7” that involved my own nephew, Ruberto’s own nephew was also involved. This case was the drowning of Barry Griffin and Richard Retzel in Laurel Lake by seven Lenox youths. They were charged with murder and it was downgraded to manslaughter and they were aquitted. Dukakis was governor at the time and was embroiled in the appeals of this case. I was active with NatLFed in the early 1990’s, so this was background I did not figure out until later. The favor-trading that went into the dropping of the charges involved Ruberto and the favor-trading that was part and parcel of any working-class relief efforts involved that old fish-market building along with all the wink-&-nod agreements that accompanied those efforts.
NatLFed leaders, like all cult leaders. are supremely arrogant. They do not beleive that “outsiders” communicate and understand their world as human beings. NatLFed was hand-in-glove with the basest mafia elements in Massachusetts. GE had to dump PCB’s, NatLFed helped. NatLFed silenced the whistleblowers, and everyone in aquthority had the Ruberto relationship and that fish-market staring them in the face any time they thought of listening to the whistleblowers. NatLFed controlled the direction of every social-service organization in Berkshire County, imbuing every single one with its insane totalitarian ethic. The cadres around the food pantry were all also involved in Pittsfield Community Television and controlled it thoroughly, attacking any citizen who tried to use it to question local events. I remember the way the people who blew the whistle on the PCB’s were hounded out of the station, as I was.
After I left NatLFed, I got a job as a color-matcher in a silk-screened wallpaper factory. It was a nice job, but short-lived. I had to rely on the protection of the local police because of the stalking of me and family members, and those officers knew that they could not pursue their investigations very far before bumping into the legacy of the Lenox 7 case. The best they could do was make it very clear that they would be right on top of anyone who harmed me or mine, but they could not protect us from the character-assasination and continuous petty harrassment that NatLFed hoped would inspire suicide.
Warfrog, I am a woman and the way the cult I was in used people against each other left me with similar damage. Friendship is very hard for me and even affected my work, because my work carries a certain risk of publicity which can expose my employment and living arrangments. Sometimes I am immobilized because of it. I am not a naturally secretive person and so it is very hard for me. Because of my open personality, I have learned to project a very false persona so that if my requests for anonymity are not honored it will still be hard for cultists to connect with my actual employers or other associates. (I am an artist and I am very cautious about not advertising but only working for people through references.) This is hard for me because honesty is part of trust. I am Catholic and lying is a sin. But in the Catechism there is a long discussion of protective lying compared to deceptive, and the sinfulness is related to the intention. Also, as a Catholic I rely on the diaries of Saints for personal advice and just recently Saint Faustina (Polish saint of “Divine Mercy”) showed me in her Diary that she struggled with having her confidence betrayed by others in her convent, and she was shown in prayer that it is OK to withhold one’s thoughts from some people when they ask “friendly” questions.
In a cult we are often taught not to reject invasive questions but to always be “friendly”. It helps to know that even Saints were allowed to turn a cold shoulder to such questions or false friendships.
You are not heartless, even though you may feel as though your heart has been turned to ice. You must slowly cultivate a very small group of friends who understand character assasination (didn’t Jesus Himself warn us to watch out for those who kill the soul more than those who might kill the body?) and eventually you will realize you have trusting relationships again, but it is a very slow process.
My own cult experience is rooted in a “family cult”. This is still a problem because of all the members of the rather large family who continue the pattern, which is particularly nasty.
I blame it on the fact that my mother, (who is now in Heaven, all forgiven) relied on my eldest sister to raise the rest of us and so she (that sister) became locked into a control pattern at an early age and never really grew up. She became a very successful person in life but she operated as a controller through all kinds of manipulative tactics of siccing one relative on another. I went into a real cult partly because I did not have a healthy family pattern from which to grow out into the world, and so when I looked for companionship outside my family, I found it in a cult that reflected the control techniques I already knew.
The family goes after the children if you separate from them but your adult children do not understand what happened in the past. I tried to warn my daughter not to accept an invitation to my sister’s house but she did not take me seriously and she went, and I never saw her again, although I had several conversations trying to get her to protect herself. My brother saw what happened, but he wants to protect the family.
My daughter was mob-attacked and broken down. She went into hiding after that.
We cannot put our families in jail for something like this. I have been assured that if a few witnesses would come forward, it might be possible to put my sister in jail because she is known to the police to have intimidated witnesses, but as I say, she has been successful in life, and her victims mostly live in some form of hiding, and are too damaged to be witnesses against successful upstanding citizens who enjoy the protection of better-placed relatives.
If we do put my sister in jail, her children will attack the witnesses and the children of the witnesses.
And I would say that my sister started out as the leader of a one-member cult because she still keeps another sister as a psychological prisoner, they have been like that all their lives: my controlling cult-leader sister never actually had to punish anyone directly. She always had the next-eldest do anything she would have gotten in trouble for. Then as the rest of us grew up, we always faced that kind of thing from the two of them, before we were even old enough to have words for it.
I do know from the therapy that saved my life that my sister has severe narcissistic personality disorder, the hallmark disease of the cult-leader personality. The only comfort I can take is that I forced other members of my family to think about what they did to me and this enables the younger ones to protect themselves, even if they outwardly hate me for being outspoken.
I am a Catholic by upbringing who went for years away from the church and spent some time in a political cult, but am now mostly recovered and have re-entered the mainstream Roman Catholic church.
During my travels over the years I went through that period of cult-hopping that seems to affect so many after exit from a seriously damaging cult. Fortunately I had good specialized therapy as well as the help of this board and some of the old anti-cult activists and so my antennae were sensitive and I was not fully recruited into any new cults, although I had a couple of close calls.
Anyway, because the political cult I was in is notorious for infiltrating charity and church groups as well as because so many cults use similar tactics, I learned to notice the little sub-groups inside larger groups that seem to be feeding cults. ‘Some of them act like funnels pulling people away from the parent church and some actually attempt to subvert and take over the congregation of the parent church.
I have noticed that there are not many threads on cults that are primarily Catholic or that seem to adhere to Catholic communities, although there are threads on pseudo-Christian cults that twist Bible theology into control tactics. I would like to open a discussion that will encourage Catholics to openly talk about this problem of destructive cults masquerading inside our big church. Some of them are dangerous and they often build a “starter” membership before being ejected and then, when they are no longer Catholic, they are able to convince the outside world that the only problem was they criticized the Pope or something like that. Some continue to characterize themselves as Catholic.
I have seen several of these serious cults inside the Catholic church, especially in the retreat system. These are usually handled by the Church “in-house”, that is, the local priest or bishop will usually place some limits around their activity and warn people about them, but this does not always happen. Catholics are only alert to cult activity of that type if we are fully involved with our church enough to notice the discrepancies in the cult’s theology and to hear these warnings. Non-catholics who are invited to the cult may think it is fully Catholic. Casual catholics who attend Mass occasionally but don’t pay much attention to theology may also be fooled. The Catholic church is actually very tolerant of these groups (too tolerant, sometimes) and so it is up to the individuals to know how to respond to them.
There is another kind of stalker, often online but also off-line. The “gossip-stalker” is someone who uses casual common interest (both in the same project thread, or in the same church committee, etc) to get into small talk which quickly veers into a bad direction. They increasingly are feeding that information into unofficial back-ground checking schemes run by nonprofit orgs and others who are always looking for volunteers or beneficiaries (so they can apply for more grants)
The first flag for me is always when the questions shift from general ones to details. Why would someone who knows I did not share any town or neighborhood connections with them want to know the details of who my grown children are and where they are? This is also true about general questions about work. Of course we ask people what they do, do they have families, etc in the course of small-talk, but when it is not enough to tell someone you work in retail but they must know which store and how long and what position and how-do-you-manage-on-low-pay, that is a big flag. The “low-pay” assumption is a trick. If you are indeed low-paid, you are invited to apply for “help” but if you defend yourself by revealing that you are well-paid, you are targeted for some other action.
What I do when this happens is slow the conversation down immediately with a very general non-answer, and watch the person for how determined they are to get details. Some people, especially in small towns, actually do not realize how incredibly invasive and rude they are being and when they see me slow down and give an answer like “oh, my daughter does not live here. (stop)” or “oh, I make enough to manage. (stop)” they will back off but occasionally they pursue and that is when the flag goes up. I have recently dealt with one who tried to pursue after I said “you know, you’re asking me about things that really aren’t anyone’s business” and she went to the next level: insinuating I have something to hide because I would not talk about my work.
At this point the gossip-stalker has got you by the short-curlies if you do not slam boundaries down around her (or him), especially if you have to work in some way in that person’s vicinity.
I have finally gotten good at delivering a short speech I was taught to use in spite of how over-reactive it may feel: “I told you to stop invading my privacy and now I am giving you a legal warning. Do not ask me about my income, my family, and do not ask anyone else. This is a legal warning.”
If you are active in settings where you occasionally face this kind of info-stalker you should actually practice saying this sentence by yourself because it is not easy to just say it quickly when you face a situation, but if you have memorized it you will say it when you need it.
This usually gets a wild reaction which is why it is unpleasant to use and I only use it on someone who has pushed me past the gentle “none of your business” remark. In my state there is a law that once someone knows that any particular form of personal contact is unwelcome they can be considered a stalker, especially if they persist for three incidents of that unwelcome behavior. It does not have to be for sexual motives, it can be just anyone. It does not require any limits on the other person’s freedom to be in the same location or interact in any other way, and it is very clear that if you have said the above statement the person cannot claim they thought they were helping you, etc. which is a common ploy of these groups that go looking for victims to help.
Females are supposed to be victims and so these gossip-stalkers (also female in most cases) find every kind of excuse to identify unattached women so they can tell us we are victims in need of whatever meeting they are setting up. Sometimes these crazy activists will actually approach an employer to persuade the employer that I am being exploited! A whole team of these people once did this to me when I had a damm good job as a design expediter and they wanted my art work for their project! They thought it was terrible that an artist was working in a factory!!!! (They did not even know I was the design expediter for the company. They only knew that I sat out in the parking lot at lunch in my old jeans just like everyone else. They did not affect my job but they sure did piss me off! One of them had small-talked me into revealing my “day-job” and that was the result! This is only one of many such stories I can tell from the days I was too close to a certain pseudo-feminist cult.)
Sallie, how would a “true sociopath” be excluded from those who commit suicide? Certainly there are reasons to commit suicide which are sociopathic rather than emotionally depressed. Anyone who believes they are affecting the world, material or spiritual, by committing suicide (crossing over to another level in which they believe they’ll still have power, for example) is just using suicide as another element in their sociopathic game.
Of course they ultimately lose their own game when they do that, yet I don’t see suicide as being an indicator that the person was not a sociopath. Just look at terrorist suicide, for example. What are such people if not the ultimate sociopaths: walking bombs?
One thing to recognize is that a group can devolve into a cult structure almost accidentaly. It can happen when someone gets into leadership without a good balance of team members and if they have more power than is legitimate they may use cult-leader tactics t.o try to get their job done. If they discover they are good at it or happen to have the kind of personality that thrives on manipulating others, then what can happen is that the rest of the leadership team and the core membership will gradually support them as the uncomfortable members leave.
If you stay in a group like that, your own loyalty to the original good purpose of the group can blind you to what is going on. It is always a good idea to take a look at a change in membership if it begins to change the character of the group. Some leaders will quietly bring in their own members, this is common when a cult takes over a church group. They come in through committees after the old membership has become disgruntled enough to leave and then the leader appeals to “tolerance” of a different attitude in the new people who show up to fill the void.
Always find a way to maintain some kind of personal loyalty among your friends in any group so that you can look them up and find out the “real” reasons they left, since most people will give acceptable excuses while quietly slipping away from a group that is “going cult”. Leaders can look benign until they feel confident that no one is watching and that is when innocent people get hurt, when they turn evil.
I am going to describe a common technique that I think is also covered in a lot of the classic cult-mind-control literature. Steve Hassan covered some of this in his work on the NatLFed political cult but it is also common in religious and other types of cult.
Basically, the mind has several layers of attention to the outside world. Some people are strongly inclined to pay attention closely to things, such as to deep reading of a difficult book, while others are strongly inclined to allow material to play around the edges of their attention while they do physical activities. Someone who enjoys listening to books-on-tape while jogging might be an example of this kind of attention. Probably most people fall into the second style than into the first style of paying attention to a subject.
Everyone knows about that common hypnotic state that goes with driving a familiar route. You suddenly discover you have arrived even though you are not aware of the past ten minutes or so of driving that same set of streets.
All I am doing now is calling attention to the fact that there is nothing special about how our minds work, our minds all are very similar and have very similar sets of attention skills that go with our tasks. Some of us work to develop attention skill but most of us go with what we have.
What a cult can do, and what those who are dependent on video media seem to do, is set you up with enough repetitious and slightly confusing or vague material so that while you may start out with the fully-engaged attention similar to the person reading a deep book, you are soon distracted. Small questions start to crop up in your mind but the material flows in such a way that you don’t have time to fully ask the question. You attention starts getting scattered. Of course, something has to motivate you to stay with the video or the book or the lecturer at that moment.
If you are physically at a meeting, then there is a strong motivation to stay through the whole thing. If you are listening to a tape or watching a video, then there may be something that is included as a means of keeping you tuned in. An attractive speaker or a calm tone of voice may keep your attention so you are waiting for some reward of something that makes sense while you listen to a droning and rambling speech. Or there may have been a promise made at the beginning that keeps you motivated even while bored.
Professional cultists know just about where the average person will start to drift. Depending on their goal, they will insert little mini-remarks or suggestions at exactly those points, and they will repeat them in different ways through the course of speeches. Because you mostly hear those after your mind has started to shut off, they get in subliminally. They may be references to certain races or groups but they also may be references to certain types of characters.
These references are not developed in the material given to most newbies to a cult. But as the member advances, some of the references will show up in more open detail and the member may be surprised that they suddenly agree with this formerly rejected idea of hating that category of people. They don’t remember making a decision to hate, and so the material presented by the cult at the advanced stage might appear to be what is convincing or justifying the hate. Hate is a powerful emotion. If you feel hate and you do not know where it came from, you “own” it as yours, and you tend to agree with others who share that hate.
I hope that my description shows that this method will in fact affect even people who think they are aware of what is going on when they choose to examine cult materials, even from a critical point of view.
It is not a good idea to listen to an entire video or set of videos from some of these groups because you are being affected by them just as surely as you will be affected by eating too much fat no matter how much you thnk healthy veggies will balance the fat.
If you feel compelled to watch cult videos while trying to “fight” a cult, PLEASE make sure you watch them in very short bursts and have some balancing material, some opposing material, handy to read or look at BETWEEN sessions of examining the cult material.
The entire MK-Ultra thing raises another question: are we all subjected to a kind of cult-softening by the media’s reliance on sensationalism at the expense of intelligent, factual material?
What I see happening with that kind of material is that whether it is true or not, it never gets denied or put into perspective by the government or any other authority. This may be because some of it is very true, especially that which stems from the period of psychological experimentation with LSD and other such drugs, and the rest is just plausible enough to be hard to disprove. It also may be because of the dynamics of conspiracy-thinking. Once people are locked onto a passionately held “truth” of their own, they not only reject criticism, they attack critics. It is far worse to be guilty of 5% of an accusation than to be guilty of the whole thing in this kind of situation.
So, while conspiracy theorists themselves cannot be accused of building cults because they are usually disconnected individuals with only a common interest in certain books and films, and many of us do benefit from examning that material from time to time, conspiracy theory provides a platform on which cult-builders can operate. An alternative “Apocalypse”, as it were.
So rather than talk about MK-Ultra and its attendant elements beyond identifying them, why not talk about all the apparent cults that build up around that material?
Are any of the online forums for conspiracy discussion, for example, are connected to real-life communes or groups who could qualify as cults?
I remember DeSisto. I once lived in Great Barrington, a nest of filthy cults. The DeSisto School was operating there because that town was probably one of the most abuse-friendly and cult-friendly places in America.
Our children as well as some teachers were attacked by the feminist cult that operates in that area (as well as others). You can read about that in the book “Who Stole Feminism?” by Christina Hoff Sommers. She describes the mob attacks on a mathmatics and a political-science professor at Simon’s Rock College.
I was a receptionist at that college at the time. Children in the middle school were also being attacked by mobs of other children, and one of them leading the little mobs was the daughter of a group leader in the feminist cult. Imitating what she saw her parents and the other adults practicing. Hoff doesn’t write about that part, but her description of what the adults were doing is chilling.
There was a whole population of adults in that town who came in with the DeSisto School, the Waldorf School, and some others who promoted cult politics into everyone’s lives.
Everyone should expose the DeSisto School and expand the exposure, please! Thank you SOOO much for opening this thread!
James Bernardo was murdered in the middle of that child-abuse cult madness. His killer, Lewis Lent, was not connected to any school and he lived in North Adams, but was certainly able to hide because of so many child-abuse activities going on, some of which definitely involved the Great Barrington Police Department. Bernardo’s grandparents lived near Great Barriington and his father worked in Great Barrington and he often spent time with other children his age in Great Barrington, and all of them were terrified of stalkers, before the word was even common. We had an informal parents’ watch group set up to protect our children and we knew something terrible was going on and the police were protecting the abusers. Many of the abusers worked at those schools and had the protection of people like DeSisto. The child-porn rings fed off the foster care system there, too. It became obvious during the six years between Bernardo’s murder and Lent’s arrest that certain police were more concerned about protecting the rings than about finding a killer. A few police had to defy their bosses in city hall in order to get the job done, as far as it got done.
The cults of Berkshire County are a subject all their own. DeSisto is certainly one of the main culprits.
(Stockbridge and Great Barrington are next door to each other. All those little towns in Berkshire County had common populations and employment patterns.)
This description of the gays attacking the Repent America street preachers in Philadelphia by blowing whistles is not the first time this happens.
My name is Denise Matteau. I don’t care anymore what you bastards reading this want to do to me. I did not see that story in 2004 because I was burying my father and trying to protect my daughter, who was attacked at my sister’s house by a crowd of screaming cultists. I was threatened and spent my time helping the father of another victim of the same cult, a murdered victim, try to get the old case re-opened.
But ten years and several other murder-victims earlier TAKE BACK THE NIGHT CULT that is FUNDED AND RUN by the Democratic filth of this country did the same kind of mob attack to me outside my art studio in Pittsfield Massachusetts.
They attacked me with whistles in my ears. I was standing outside my art studio talking with a couple of other women, asking them why they were marching. They were forced to march. The Women’s Center would not allow crime victims to have benefits if they did not participate. Three of the marshalls came up and told the women to get back in the parade. They ordered them not to talk with me and while one was ordering them, two deafened me with the whistles. I am still hearing-impaired.
They were marching up and down in front of businesses blowing bullhorns and they had children that they trained to lay down and role-play as victims while the obviously BUTCH marshalls.
They had a speech about tearing down the patriarchy, every patriarchal aspect of society had to be torn apart. Starting with families.
This was 1994. Just like in the article in that Snopes link, they had police protection. One sergeant spoke up about it and about his anger and shortly after that, he died of a sudden blood disorder. In 2000 another law enforcement investigator who challenged Bobbi Gagne of the same women’s center group (and also a major activist in the Neil Brick MK-Ultra cult, incidentally) died and because I knew that investigator pretty well, the state police thought I could shed some light on some tattoos because they thought he also had a sudden and suspicious blood disorder but I did not anything about his tattoos.
They were placing lifelike silhouettes of children in strategic places with bold print of “father rapes little girl” and similar beginning-reader level triggers in children’s libraries and then having substitute teachers report domestic incest if the children talked aobut that art work in class. The subs were given training to profile children’s comments without being told the same children would have seen the artwork during those same weeks. The subs were given questions to ask that could elicit the remarks.
I was targetted because I refused to honor the leftwing gay artists’ boycott of the Stockbridge Library art gallery. I has a solo show there of my paintings and pastels. I also was known to be attending a Christian church.
My daughter was attacked by an organized mob at Taconic High School the same year. It was insitgated by the school counselor because my daughter was accused of being gay because she was not promiscuous. (In fact, her boyfriend did not go to the highschool and they did not know she dated)
She was ordered by the counselr to go to the Unitarian Church after she was attacked in the hallway of Taconic High School. I did not know that the Unitarian Church was a cult because I was raised Catholic and I thought they were just protestant.
My daughter was scared because of the teachers joining the students in the attack at Taconic High School. I told her to take her boyfriend with her, we all thought it was just going to be another lecture on not hating gay people.
Instead it was the lesbian Barbara Haugman the Unitarian Pastor and a group of adults, 40 yrs old, about a dozen of them, mob attackede my daughter and her friend. Both of them came home shaken and pale. This was a week or so after the other attack, some months before I was attacked. The group incircled andf screamed at them until they were broken down.
Not long after that my daughtter became pregnant. I was not told. She had actually wanted to be a midwife and she studied to be a doullah, she was a loving girl, and she was a ski instructor from age 14, she was a brilliant and beautiful young woman.
The counselors, who all work through the same horrific gay cult at the Women’s Center, told my beautiful daughter that she would have a terrible life if she brought this child into the world and if she would agree with them to abort it, she would have her college completely paid for, and she would not be a burden to me. She told me later they kept telling her she was a burden to me. They told her she would be hurting me if she had the child. The father was her boyfriend and he and she both wanted it, but they both had been attacked and now these same people were attacking them again and they were prevented from contacting anyone. The pregnancy was not early. My daughter had started to plan to have the child but was being told not to tell me, and later she told me that they deliberately stalled her when they began yelling at her to have the abortion, she said ok but they stalled it so that it would be worse for her. The young father told me the same thing.
I only found this out long after the abortion happened. My daughter was told to hide in her room and not speak of any symptoms. The Pittsfield Masssachusetts Women’s Center was using abortion as a terrorist attack on girls, insisting that they go through a private horror. The Unitarian Church uses abortion to train for human sacrifice. Gays are training people for full human sacrifice. They have been systematically attacking our children and we have been silent because no one would believe us. We did not believe what we were seeing.
Take Back The Night cult is in all the churchs. In the Catholic Church it is called “Call To Action”, it is fully in charge of the Evangelical Lutheran and Gay Episcopalian churches.
They have been protected every step of the way by the Democratic Party. NatLFEd has also been protected every step of the way and every former cadre knows that it fully enabled the set-up of the vicious lesbian and gay militants while NatLFed ran the bribes and disabled the blue-collar classes with fake Hispanic crap like Gerry Doeden and the other white trust-fund babies taking Hispanic names and they all ran the death-cult art into the town.
That was why my studio was targeteed. I was not co-operating. I was just “doing art” and I was working on a print-video project at Channel Five with other non-political traditional artists in the print trade and illustration trade, producing a program that would have shown regular, skilled artists.
Now we see the full death-cult coming out of the Bible belt as “Repent America” but “Repent America” is only a small reaction to what has been going on: the actual full-scale emasculation of Black Americans by the Gay movment and the attacks on our children and our families and the destruction of what was once a thriving civilization.
That Snopes article describing the whistles is describing exactly what they did to me, all alone, just watching their horrible nazi gay march.
As a Catholic I have to accept suffering, and if it were not for the training my faith has given me in accepting suffering I would not be able to witness to the truth of what is happening around us.
We are fighting the death cult here in Texas, but we are not using RepentAmerica’s tactics. Repent America has allowed the death cult of the gay militants to poison its own thoughts.
Instead of engaging in infantile personal assault, are you able to refute that citation, shakti?
This board is about CULT damage to the individual human being’s ability to think clearly.
Attacking people with mockery without even attempting a logical or factual refutation of their statements is an example of how cult-damaged minds work. Such minds have lost the ability to examine statements and think about them. Such minds can only react personally to the speakers, and cannot attack the ideas with critical thinking but can attack the speakers with insults.
Shakti, please stop disrupting threads that are about cult damage with your obvious hatred of Catholics in general.
Your disdain for Catholics is not relevant to a discussion of cults that damage Catholic communities. It makes as much sense as if you decided to go over to the “Australian Cult” discussion and start attacking them for being Australian or attacking their political system, instead of allowing them to talk about a cult that is damaging some of their people and their communities.
Brainwashed, one of the things I learned from my therapist regarding PTSD might be helpful to you. It is best to do this with a therapist, but you can probably also do it on your own. (and better to be on your own than to be with a therapist who supports Tolle’s ideas )
Here it is: Learn the things that “mark” your state of mind when you are not doing well. It might be different for you than for PTSD, but not very different. PTSD involves dissociation from the actual present moment into a memory of a past moment that was traumatic. What you seem to be describing as an effect of Tolle is a kind of dissociation into nothingness.
But there should probably be stages of noticeable change from your alert “normal” state to your “tolle-brainwashed” state of non-thinking. Notice the changes and find ways to stop them and move yourself back to your normal alert state.
You might not want to do this all at once but these things kind of build on each other.
Reconnect yourself to the outside world. If you feel yourself withdrawing, do something like take a very hot or very cold shower, do something physical, listen to some loud active music, get your juices flowing again. Reward yourself in some way, even if just a small self-congratulations, for breaking the tolle-mood.
Find physical and sensual things that are healthy that you can easily use to reconnect and as soon as you are reconnected, use your intellect, too. Go into online forums and argue about politics (mygod! am I really advising this? yes, I am! **lol**) go into sports forums and tell someone their team is a bunch of wusses, go into youtube and watch a bunch of comedies, anything to get ALL your juices flowing. Join an active team of somekind, whether it is a service team like an environment clean-up or a simple cycling or something like that, just make sure it is outward-directed and keeps you in active socialo contact with different kinds of people. Even just get a part-time job flipping burgers for the heck of it for a few months. Maybe get a dog who demands attention. The key is: sensual connection, social connection, full use of your faculties.
Freedom is Sacred blog
From 2010 to 2013, Denise Matteau wrote 27 articles on her Freedom Is Sacred blog, which she subtitled, Denise Matteau’s blog defending free speech, freedom of religion, and the right to live free of vigilante harassment and intimidation. (links may be to many different kinds of groups or writers. That’s what Freedom looks like.)
Of interest is the article called About This Blog dated October 25, 2010, which can be viewed in full at the link above. Denise Matteau comments, “Tonight I was motivated to finally open a blog dedicated to this problem because one of the RRI’s fringe associates has begun moving the attack-postings off the platform of “let’s just tell the world Denise is fat and ugly” onto a double track of calling for multiple “reports of me to ‘authorities’ and also an attempt to characterize me as someone who is likely to be suicidal.” What Denise Matteau is referring to is something she considers connected to the Rick Ross forum at the Cult Education Institute, and also another forum at xjcs.org. concerning a group called the Jesus Christians.”
“Having nothing to lose is not to say I have nothing. I am indeed a very successful artist with my own vocation in the private sphere (far outside their paltry realm) and I will not lose any friends or any professional support to these ignorant bigots because I have no connection to anyone who would respect them.”
“I have created this blog in my own interest and in the interest of all other victims of the RRI hate movement, a movement of which Zeuzsor and Verity Evangelene/Sisi/Agur are perhaps the two most vile examples outside of Rick A. Ross himself.”
Facebook: In Memory of Faith (Sojie) Jackson 6/17/1976-8/26/2010
I found Denise Matteau’s reflections on October 28, 2014 notable as again she calls for an investigation into the death of her daughter, for what she claims was murder. Again, we see the family bitterness that extends years back, that has never been resolved in her own heart. This article is best read in context with the entire Facebook tribute to Denise’s daughter, which includes some very sweet family photos.
Recent Accusations by Denise Matteau
I am familiar with the background of Dave Sweigert, having researched it in detail in 2017, when the Port of Charleston incident occurred. Since then I have been monitoring the lawsuits related to Crowdsource the Truth, and understand many of the facts that underlie this ongoing story.
The extent of the falsehoods which Denise Matteau has promoted in her videos and are included in recent email documents known to Dave Sweigert represent serious allegations unsupported by evidence. On September 9, 2019, a set of emails were sent to various government agencies by Denise Matteau accusing various persons of criminal acts. If you think your name was mentioned in these emails, contact Dave Sweigert at his blog checkmatek2.net.
His response to these emails was to present Denise Matteau with a Spoliation Notice.
The above documents have been laid out in chronological order as a means of understanding a portion of the history behind some of allegations which Denise Matteau has leveled against others. Despite her intelligence and skills and sometimes insightful observations, she has created a problem for others when she records her defamatory remarks on internet blogs and videos.